Be Honest

This Thursday was a long day. After lift and practice in the morning, I spent every spare moment studying for an anatomy practical on muscles (just about every muscle in the body). During the 3 hour lab, I took the muscles test. Afterwords, my instructor said we could take the sheep brain practical, too. This entailed naming 40 parts of the sheep brain from memory. I went for it and completed both practicals.

I called Camille after lab. We made plans to hangout, maybe share some food. It would have to be quick because she was hanging out with her friends at 7:00pm. This means I would have to postpone my dinner at home to eat some snacks with Camille. Against my longings, I went to spend time with her.

I should have been honest with myself and what I needed. It wasn’t long before I began an argument—I was in no place to interact with somebody after being tired and having no substantial food in me. We split for the night upset with each other, all because I was too fixated on making others happy as I neglected taking care of myself.

Be honest with yourself and what you need. If you need a night to yourself, take it. Time spent filling your cup will allow you to give 100% to your relationships. Know your triggers (being hungry) and do everything possible to mitigate them so your loved ones don’t get hurt.

Maybe More Isn’t Better

The whiteboard in the library read:

Question of the Week:

If you had to give up all of your possessions but one, what would you keep?

I told the librarian, Martha, she was getting to philosophical on me. This was a question that required more thought than the previous ones. I took the hour before recording my answer—

My journal

I find that the less happy I am, the more I desire things. Conversely, the more happy I am, the less I need. Many sages throughout history have mirrored this sentiment. Many of my influences of late have as well, people like Mike Posner, Tim Ferriss, B.J. Miller, Aubrey Marcus, Thomas Aquinas, and David Goggins. Things don’t make you happy. Being you is joy enough.

So why a journal? Because I can find a computer, a phone, clothes, and my favorite books again, but I can’t recreate my thoughts. I need something to remind me of who I was and who I’ve become, as well as something to sketch out a plan of where to go next. If I lost all my possessions, I believe a journal with a few empty pages would be enough to remember what this life is really about.

My Ideal Authentic Leadership Self

We had a Personal Leadership Development Paper due in Perspectives on Leadership today. In 5-6 pages we were tasked with performing a self-assessment of our strengths and weaknesses, identifying our ideal authentic leadership self, and making a realistic action plan to become this leader in 6-12 months. Easy enough. The way I saw it, there were two ways to approach this assignment: as I approach a boring biology class (and just get by) or or as I approach running track (actually wanting to better myself agains the odds). For a change, I chose the latter.

Over the past week, I created the most genuine self-assessment of my life to date. I identified my strengths and got to the core wounds of my weaknesses, not just how they symptomize in reality. From a deep reflection on my assessment, I came up with my ideal authentic leadership self, which I describe in the following statement:

I want to be an Aware Leader Discovering Myself and How I Serve.

In awareness I aim to improve my weaknesses of being controlling, being impatient, and not listening to others. In Discovering Myself I will maintain my current strengths of being authentic, having a desire to learn, and being a man of commitment. Through Discovering How I Serve, I will reflect in such a way so as to craft a path for my life after college.

My action plan is exciting. I’ll be sharing more about it in the coming weeks. It won’t be easy, but I’ve structured it in a feasible way. In the remainder of this semester and next, I’ll blend meditation and reading with weekly reflections and vision book entries. I will become a better leader by being more aware of my daily actions and habitual trends. I will learn the true value of committing to self betterment by holding myself accountable.

Let’s begin the journey, one step at a time.

Oatmeal & Eggs

Of late, my favorite breakfast currently is steel cut oatmeal with three sunny-side up eggs. Steel cut, sunny-side up. I call it savory oatmeal, but a lot of people call it strange. For one who’s never tried it, combining two breakfast staples like this seems odd, even appalling. I get it—I was one of those people once. But I tried it, and that changed everything.

I’m trying to think back to the first time I dropped the perfectly cooked sunny-side up eggs into a bowl of pain oats and I can’t picture it. It’s astounding how alien it is the first time you perform a ritual. It doesn’t make sense to you or anybody else, but you’ve heard it works. So you go for it, all the way. Oatmeal in eggs. Cold shower. Sandals with jeans. Freedom from fear of judgment, openness to a new way of living.

This is a new way of living: being open to new experiences, having our souls be free to explore this world free from shackles of false beliefs. Today can be the first day for you, the first day of a new ritual or lifestyle. All you need is a will stronger than your desire for permanence.

Don’t forget about Time Management

I just recorded the 4th episode of It’s All Mahalo with my girlfriend, Camille. It’ll be published around Friday. If you want to listen to the first 3 episodes, you can find it wherever you get your podcasts: Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify, iHeartRadio.

This week, Camille and I had a conversation about our passions, our futures, and being okay with giving up some control. We culminated the discussion by talking about how we can implement these concepts practically into our daily lives. The answer, as Camille pointed out, has to be Time Management.

The biggest takeaway from this conversation as to focus on timely habits rather than achieving goals within a timeframe. An example: if you want to start reading before bed, make it a priority to read for 20 minutes before bed as opposed to reading 40 pages before bed. This allows you to have some freedom within your schedule and focusses on the process of reading rather than the end goal of completing a book. With emphasis on the habit of reading, we become free to read rather than bound to our commitment of reading a certain amount.

This method can be extrapolated to many things aside from reading. The next time I want to implement something into my daily life, I’m going to focus on the habit over achievement, on the process instead of the goal. After all, life is the process of living, not the goal of having lived.

The Benefits of Intermittent Fasting

I fasted for 21 hours today. From 10pm last night to 7pm today, all I consumed was water, an americano, and the Eucharist. When I started fasting like this, I would get very angry in the middle of the day. My energy was all over, I couldn’t focus, and I said hurtful things to my loved ones. But since building up a tolerance to fasting, hunger is often replaced with greater mental clarity, and discouraging remarks towards family and friends turn into awareness.

I feel as if fasting takes the attention off me and places it on the immediate world around me. Smells become more vivd and colors become brighter. I can see other people for who they are instead of who I want them to be for me. My whole world becomes less self-centered and more focussed in on my environment. All of this because I chose not to eat until dinner.

Being a college athlete with workouts nearly every day, fasting becomes far less possible during the season. But rest days on the weekends are fair game. So long as I can resist the urge to guzzle down waffles and omelettes, I might just have my most productive days of the week. If only…

Here’s to the joys of not eating. Hip, hip.

Keep it Simple

A Post-It note above my desk readers three words: Keep it Simple. Three words is all it takes to remind myself of the most disguised and hidden truth in the natural world. I, like the rest of the human race, tend to overcomplicate, overthink, and overpower each of my daily tasks. From washing dishes to walking to class to writing a simple paragraph response for an online discussion board, I am an expert at de-simplifying my life.

But when I read those three words, a switch goes off. Clarity overshadows me. Innovations and problem solving strategies result. I am made new by three small words.

Keep it Simple. Simple routines, simple schedules, simple meals, simple workouts, simple home decor, simple priorities. Why? Because we always lose meaning in the details.

Start with Sleep

Here’s my schedule for today:

  • 5:30 – wake, activate, and pack for day
  • 6:30 – lift with team
  • 8:00 – work in library
  • 9:00 – breakfast
  • 9:30 – Environmental Chemistry
  • 11:00 – Practice (10 x 24 second hills)
  • 1:00 – homework for Anatomy Lab
  • 2:00 – Anatomy Lab
  • 4:30 – home for dinner

Usually, Thursdays are my hard day. I’m often running on fumes because of a busy week and not the best sleep on Tuesday and Wednesday. But today was a great day, and I attribute it to prioritizing my sleep this week.

My Oura ring, AKA the most effective sleep tracking wearable technology on earth, has offered me priceless insight into my sleep habits and patterns. I learned that I’m usually “awake” for at around an hour throughout every night, so eight hours is really seven hours. I’ve also discovered that I don’t get nearly as much REM sleep as I should, leaving me to feel more tired and less energized even if I’m asleep for 8 hours.

So for me to get the best quality sleep, I should be in bed for at least 9 hours. That’s a pretty ridiculous precedent for a collegiate student athlete business owning podcaster, but it’s what I do best on. It’s how I thrive. But it can’t be how I had a great Thursday today—last night I was only in bed for 7.5 hours.

The key is the weekend. While most college students use the weekends to relax and stay out late with friends, I catch up on sleep. On Friday and Saturday nights last week, I clocked 10 hours each. I’ve discovered this allows me to cheat a couple days during the week. While the goal is no cheating and 9 hours each night, this added insurance definitely makes a difference.

Sleep more. It’s the simplest antidote to better health. Before going to the doctor, try getting a week of good sleep. Coupled with filtered water and whole food diet, your health issues might become a thing of the past.

Past the Threshold

You know the moment—the “what did I get myself into” moment. The “this was a terrible idea” moment. The “not today” moment. It’s ubiquitous because you and I are hard wired to seek comfort.

I feel this pain of indecision every time I go to get in an ice bath. Then, every time, I turn my brain off and jump right in, up to my neck. Immediately my body curses me, wondering why I put myself through this suffering week after week. Today, I was in the tub for thirty seconds and my brain was still trying to pull me out. I actually felt my body start to make a move for the exit, but I reeled it back in and breathed deep. I’ve made it through much worse than five minutes of cold water.

Nobody fully understands the power of the human mind. Its influence is evasive yet supple, able to be changed on an instant but rock solid in neurologic programming. Many people believe that our decisions are just a complex series of electrical and chemical processes, shaped by our environments, upbringing, and the current environment. They think the brain is destined to make one decision over another.

But there’s one thing I’ve learned from my life experience: the mind can be trained.

Whether it’s telling yourself that you will finish this workout, last five minutes in the cold, or stay away from sugar this week, the mind is capable of a lot. Most importantly, it’s capable of moving you past the threshold of pain into the arena of choice. Your mind offers you freedom by granting you access to a world of potentiality, one few people know exists. But it has to be trained; it cannot only be subject to the soft world we live in.

Harden your mind by doing difficult things. You will be better because of it.

Senator Bob Casey

A classmate in my Perspective on Leadership course is related to Senator Bob Casey (PA). In an effort to learn from thoughtful leaders in the world, we set up a video conference call tonight and were able to ask him questions. We talked about personal values, what it means to be of service, and how faith can inspire your decisions. It was a productive conversation.

Senator Casey placed a great deal of significance on his faith and Jesuit education. Though people who vote for him may not share his beliefs, he is unapologetic in believing in God and sharing how is faith impacts his choices in life. He told to remember the song We Are Called when discerning our own missions in life. The hymn goes as follows:

We are called to act with justice,

We are called to love tenderly,

We are called to serve one another,

To walk humbly with God.

I find politics confusing and boring, but this conversation reminded me that politicians are people too. There’s a great deal we can learn from our public officials, and Senator Casey affirmed that tonight. The next time I vote, I’m going to vote on character rather than policy. We need thoughtful, grounded leaders in office.

Thank you, Senator Casey.