Healing is ugly

I broke my index finger when I was fourteen. I was playing baseball, squared up to bunt, and my finger came between the pitch and the bat. It was a cloudy day, pretty cold. Mrs. Vasas was there to give me Tylenol. My parents came soon after.

Only read the following if you have a strong stomach.

They surgically removed my nail in the emergency room. They put four stitches in my nail bed to mend the laceration. Over the next three months I wore a bandage as I waited for my finger to heal. It hurt. It was hard to clean. Taking the stitches out still haunts me. Watching my nail grow back was oddly satisfying.

My finger still looks a little off. If I press hard enough on my fingertip I can see where the stitches were. I remember the pain, but healing eventually came.

This is what makes the healing process troubling: it wouldn’t have healed if it didn’t hurt. When you feel pain your endocrine system makes a slew of healing hormones that instantly begin to clot and repair damaged tissue. Pain is a signal that something is hurting and needs attention. Without that pain, healing happens much more slowly. Here’s a study.

As I look and listen and hear the cries of the world, I’m reminded of my finger and every injury I’ve had. Healing is slow and it hurts. Healing is ugly. But healing, in the end, works, and it only works because it hurt, because it was slow.

Every day I am brought to tears by the cries of the black community in America. I cry as I learn more about the horrible treatment of indigenous people. Not a day goes by where I don’t regret not paying attention sooner. Not using my privilege for good sooner.

But now is a good time to start. Now is the only time to start. Nunc coepi means “now I begin” and that is exactly what I’ll do.

Healing is an ugly process, but the more we all hurt, the faster we can all heal. We can’t continue by just letting one group suffer. Until we all feel their pain, until we are all uncomfortable by racism, no change will happen.

I’m ready to embrace the breakdown of the world I once new so we can heal and create a better home. This time, the only people not welcome are the ones who want to keep us apart.

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia

Even when riots burn Philly to the ground, it’s still our home. It’s still Philly. The sun will rise tomorrow. Justice is rising and busting through. This city is resilient and so are it’s righteous people.

We can get through this. We can rise.

Living in a Movie

Threat of World War III. Kobe dies. Coronavirus devastates humanity. Global lockdown. 3+ month Stay at Home order. Economy tanks. Businesses close. Countless black people are senselessly murdered by racists and police. Protests turn into riots. Societal upheaval. President threatens citizens. Twitter threatens President. First amendment uncertain. Basic human rights uncertain.

Fr. McNally always said: “Life is complicated, Love is not.”

Life is complicated.

Love is not.

Justice for George Floyd

We have to stop letting racial injustices live and die as hashtags. George Floyd was murdered in cold blood. So was Ahmaud Arbery. And Breonna Taylor. And countless others.

Racism is a disease of human consciousness. Seeing other people as less than you is fundamentally delusional; it has to do with conditioning, false belief systems, and untethered judgement. No spiritually or consciously awake person can be racist. Racism is impossible if you truly respect all other people. It’s only possible if you don’t.

Protesters have been burning down buildings, destroying infrastructure, and looting stores. But the protesters cannot be to blame–it’s the fault of the media. For years “Breaking News” has become every news story. The only stories that are covered and listened to are the truly horrible ones.

Some people (including the president) say that destroying an American city is no way to get what you want. Well, in 2020, it might be the only way to make the people pay attention. It might be the only way to get the government involved. It might be the only way to actually change things.

Philosophically speaking, violence is never good. It’s a departure from the potential peace that could exist among a group of people. But the story isn’t finished. Riots and violence may be the only thing to bring our world to racial harmony and equality once and for all.

Black Lives Matter. Justice for George Floyd. If you don’t think so, you need to reconsider. We’re running out of time.

Latinex

Here’s a hot take: I’ve never met a latino or latina that likes this term.

Why is it okay for some groups to decide how other groups are included? Shouldn’t the group in question be part of the discussion? Isn’t it funny how trying to be inclusive and promote “equity” (a dangerous concept) ends up being racist?

It’s not Us vs. Them. It’s never Us vs. Them. It’s just Us.

Just Us.