Self Love on the Golf Course
I’ve been caddying for the past six summers. Most caddies start because they’ve played golf, know golf, or love golf. I started because it paid well. Over the years I’ve become a decent caddy, but not great. Far from great. Recently I’ve been learning where self love fits into golf.
I still have my slip ups on the course. I lose golf balls and misread greens each time I loop. My natural tendency is to beat myself up when I mess up. My player placed his trust in me and I let him down. Failure as a caddy, already a low-ranking position, sometimes feels like the last straw.
But this year I’ve been learning to forgive myself. To love myself. Instead of banging my head for misreading a green, I repeat my mantra over and over: “I love myself. I love myself. I love myself” (thanks Kamal 🙂 In no time, the mistake I made doesn’t matter all that much. What counts is that I love myself regardless of my shortcomings as a caddy. Or a friend. Or a son. Or a man.
Stonewall will always have a special place in my heart–a place occupied by love and hate, gratitude and frustration. It’s taken me six years to realize that who I am isn’t contingent on my caddying skills. Who I am depends on how much I love myself.